From Where I Sit

By Pat Spilseth, Columnist

“It takes a long time to make old friends.”

At a dinner party with college friends this past week, I realized even more strongly how much I enjoy being with friends from my college days at Luther. We share the same values; we remember the same college pranks and traumas, panty raids, profs, dates and breakups, weddings and now we’re growing old together.

It takes time to keep old friends.

Phone calls are important to keep the connections going. One of our classmates made phone calls to dozens of Luther classmates urging them to connect and come to our last reunion. Creighton organized gatherings of his close buddies to come to Denver to rekindle old memories. His upbeat, positive attitude made new friends with classmates he probably knew only from their class pictures in the annual.  

As we age, many of us find that our friends become a real priority in our lives. Life can get lonely at times: friends can be interesting companions, fun to share a meal, travel with and great counselors. They fill the void that sometimes creeps into our lives when our kids leave home, we move, retire or lose a parent, spouse or dear friend.  

People need other people.

Last week I was reminded of how important it is to take time out of our busy lives to spend with friends. It’s so easy to grow apart from people we care about if we rarely see or speak with them. Phone calls are great, but you can’t beat the immediate presence of a friend.    

Back in 1966, 17 girls were coeds in our senior year at Luther College who petitioned to live at Sunnyside, a tiny white cottage next to college President Farwell’s house and fraternity row. This was the only year Sunnyside was a women’s residence on campus. 

For years Sunnyside girls have met at various locations around the country to connect with each other. All of us graduated from Luther College in Decorah, Iowa, in 1966. The majority of us went on to teaching or social service jobs, but through the years we stayed in touch. Many of us married Luther classmates, had children and moved around the country. Interestingly, though we lived together in tight quarters, we didn’t really know much about each other. We were busy with school and boyfriends, travel and getting jobs. It was a great idea when several women decided it would be a good idea to meet every couple of years.  

Today, it’s hard to imagine how 17 girls lived cramped together two, three and four in minuscule bedrooms with bunkbeds. We had a housemother and a gathering room with sofa and TV, where men were allowed to visit. But we had only TWO bathrooms. How did 17 girls wash their hair, dry it with those blowup driers and put on makeup? It was amazing!

Since 1992 Sunnysiders have met for a reunion every other year. We’ve visited the  Alamo and San Antonio’s Riverwalk; explored the Big Apple; toured the pueblos and art galleries of Santa Fe, N.M.; boated on Wayzata’s Lake Minnetonka, visited Lincoln’s home in Springfield; walked the Lake Michigan beach at Door County, Wis.; visited the sculpture garden at Franconia; revisited our favorite college haunts at Deborah, Iowa; hiked the woods and paddled canoes at Scandia; and shopped, drank coffee and gabbed in Cannon Falls. Our numbers vary: sometimes there are 12, sometimes six, but it’s always fun and rejuvenating.

We called ourselves Sunnysiders as that was the name of our little house. Our theme song was “Sunny Side of the Street” by Steve Tyrell, but our musical roommate Ginger composed our own Sunnyside song which we sang with gusto.

Sunnysiders are older now. Our parents have passed on; our kids left home long ago. We have grandchildren whom we love to spoil and show photos on our phones to all who sit nearby. We’ve survived cancer and heart issues, divorce, loss of family member, friends and two of our Sunnyside roommates.  

We know how important friends are: they keep us happy and healthy. We Sunnysiders have been friends for a long time, over 50 years; we look forward to many more adventures together. 

It takes time to MAKE and KEEP old friends. 

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To contact Pat, email: pat.spilseth@gmail.com.